I

The me you met is gone.  The me I was going for got lost.
What happened was real.  I don't regret a thing.  I don't say sorry.
I'm not loosing sleep over a thing. If I knew then what I know now I'd only enjoy it. I'd take pleasure in knowing it would all fall apart.  That we'd both fail.  And that were both going to rot together.  But I'm not.  I don't care. I used to hate you.  I admired you.  I considered you to be one of my greatest friends.  Even though you weren't.  I just wished you were.  Another life.  And now I laugh inside.  To think I was so wrong. But the me that is just isn't happy about it. Something else.  I'm not sure yet what I am right now. But the me that was is now gone.  Maybe lost.  Maybe buried.  Maybe he's just asleep. Doesn't matter.  What happened doesn't matter either. Or how I got here.
Totally indifferent.
I'll try not to laugh again.  No promises though.